Episode 32: Martin Winiecki – Peace and Love in Portugal

In this episode, Martin Winiecki discusses:

  • The intentional community of Tamera, plus its Love School (both in Southern Portugal)
  • The relationship between sexuality and conflict in the world
  • His quest for a meaningful life
  • The many ways that Tamera manages conflict and uses truth and trust to prevent it and build connection
  • The importance of having an attitude of empathy and true curiosity about the “other”
  • How if people can learn the ways of community, they can use the climate crisis as a positive transition to a non-violent and more regenerative way of living
On Conflict Podcast Episode 32 Martin Winiecki

More About our Guest

Martin was born in Dresden, Germany in 1990 and has been politically engaged since his early youth. In 2006, he took a break from school to join Tamera’s Monte Cerro Peace Education, and decided to finish three years of peace studies in Tamera rather than return to a conventional education path. His training includes traveling to crisis areas and taking part in the “Grace Pilgrimages” to the Middle East and Colombia. Since 2008, he’s worked with the Institute for Global Peacework helping to establish a global network for Tamera. Since 2017, he’s organized the Defend the Sacred international activist gatherings and dedicated himself to building a global alliance.Martin has published writings in various outlets, including Kosmos Journal, TruthOut, CommonDreams, The Indypendent, Tikkun, and Uplift Connect. “I’m aware that we live in times of rapid, accelerating change and that alongside the unimaginable suffering of people, animals, and nature, there’s a revolutionary awakening taking place in this world. I’m convinced that my generation will be able to abolish war, oppression and injustice if we can unite the many groups working for a better world in a common vision for the future.”

Martin’s Resources

Resources Mentioned in the Episode

Quotes and Highlights

[1:22] Martin: “As long as I remember, I have always had this almost sense of belonging or being responsible for the larger community, whatever that was, whether it was my class in school or whether it was a sense of being not just this passive member of society, but somebody feeling responsibility.”

[3:25] Martin: “There was this Frankfurt school philosopher who said ‘A wrong life can’t be lived rightly.’ So you cannot have a right life inside of a wrong one. And so I was put on this quest with this sense of rebellion in me, and I was looking in ecological groups and in spiritual groups and in political groups, and I found different pieces of an answer but I still didn’t find perspective for a meaningful life for myself. And so getting to know a community that, in a way, set out to model on a small scale what a society would look like in which people would actually not need to go to a therapist in order to heal, or you would need to take people out of ecosystems in order for that ecosystem to heal, but to create a form of living together whereby the way we coexist, healing arises. This was just such a fundamental opening for me to a possibility for how I could use my life. It was amazing for me to get to know this place. I came here as a student, and then I ended up being a coworker.”

[6:23] Gord asks Martin if he can explain how Tamera is organized, how they work with conflict when it arises in their community, what it means to Martin, and how Tamera responds to it and how they make use of it. Julia also requests a basic orientation to Tamera.

Martin says:

  • Tamera is an intentional community and includes the Peace Research and Education Center in southern Portugal.

  • The community that Tamera is a creation of started over 40 years ago in Germany. It was founded in the after-waves off the leftist student movement of the late sixties. Its founder, Dieter Duhm, was one of the spokespeople and known authors at the nexus of Marxism and psychology back then who put forward the thesis that revolution without emancipation on the inner would ultimately result in a counter revolution, and that the issues off fear and competition and jealousy and all the interpersonal issues that are coming up in the activist groups cannot be ignored when we’re trying to create systemic change in society.

  • In 1995, after 18 years of a radical community experimentation, they came to Portugal to create what they called and we still call a healing biotope, which is a community in which the relation between people, all kinds of people actually, between parents and children, between men and women, between the generations, but also the relations between people and animals and all beings of nature, is based on trust and cooperation.

  • The project, in a way, is a research center that operates with a very radical ambition, which is that in no form of relation, inside of this societal microcosm, are we accomplices in a system of violence and fear.

  • This leads me to the point of how we deal with conflict. It’s a lot about turning ourselves as people and as a community into the research object that we ourselves are looking at, into how does conflict arise? A central observation that has been made over and over again in this work, especially as we’re looking into how does conflict arise between men and women, between parents and children, between the generations, you’re seeing that what is happening in a group, in a way reflects what is happening on the bigger global scales, what is happening between peoples, between different religious groups in the world. So in a way, when you can resolve the traumatic layers that are being touched and that then leads to these patterns of fear and defense, it is when you can really understand that and in a way permeate it with consciousness. You resolve conflict, and you also gain knowledge about something that is happening as a dynamic in the world. So the way we approach conflict has a lot to do with gaining consciousness. It’s this idea that where there is consciousness, there can be no wars.

  • We see the conflict as inherently interrelated, so like our exploitation of the earth and our lack of truth and the suppression of our own life energies are not separate things, but they’re interconnected. So if you want to end the war that humanity is engaged in towards the planet, we also need to look at how we’re suppressing nature within us, and also vice versa. We see that if you really want to use conflict as a means of creative evolution, we need to look at the wholeness of life and not just say Okay, here’s one conflict, and we’re solving it, because the whole system that is producing these conflicts just remains the same and keeps on perpetuating itself.

[12:12] Julia asks Martin if he can speak more about how one gains consciousness. 

Martin says:

  • It seems that a lot of the eruptions of aggression and violence, and all the way to war, happens in the space where an energy that had been held back before, and that is not connected with our conscious reflection, in a way breaks itself free. You could say it’s a subconscious attempt of liberation, but a lot of the destruction and also like, if you have done that and then, the next day or the next year or the next life perhaps, you feel sorry and regret for that, you realize My consciousness wasn’t present in the situation.

  • The work in the way that we’re doing is actually on different levels. The most basic level is the community level, where it is important when you acknowledge that we have layers inside ourselves where we are not innocent. All of us, we have these potentials of aggression and fear in us because we come out of a society where, in a way, fear and anger are just the two flip sides of a basic conditioning of the person who, our humanity that cannot really express itself really. So if we accept that, then it is logical that if you want to create a community of trust, you have to be able to address each other in this way. You don’t just work on conflict once there is an eruption. There is a process of self-reflection and of social transparency, where people undergo a process of making visible to each other and giving feedback to each other about what is happening inside of themselves and also reflecting to one another what they perceive. This is a logic of life: in living organisms, all the time, there is this process of feedback and communication and creative feedback loops.

  • This is, in a way, a way of reclaiming truth, because I could also say where there is truth there can be no war. In many ways, you can say those eruptions of anger are an eruption of a truth that had been held back and couldn’t be articulated in a different way. So this is really a social responsibility to create forms of life where people can make themselves visible to one another, because it is always the explosion of the other that suddenly comes up in these excesses that we are seeing in the world. 

[16:11] Martin talks about how a peaceful society is one that is based on trust, and “in order for trust to arise, you need to know that people will still stick with you even if you show the sides that may be more negative.” “There are these corners inside of us where we think, If I tell that to the people, then that’s it. And the experience of a trust community actually is, you reveal that, and they will be more connected to you because you have shown something of yourself that creates deeper connection.” 

[19:40] Gord asks Martin to revisit what he said about revelation of inner experience and the dark corners that would go on between people and says “I’m wondering if you’re also promoting or  suggesting that that would be helpful at an institutional level, or at an international level, where ideally countries or large institutions would reveal their dark parts of the things they’re struggling with to each other, or move in a direction where that kind of dialogue might be possible.” 

Martin responds by talking about the necessity of trust and responsibility in such an activity, and mentions “one of the things that we’re involved in here [at Tamera] is an alliance of leaders of different social movements and Indigenous communities and other intentional communities such as Tamera, and we are also, in a way, using this this kind of work in order to bring peacemakers and activists together in a space that they also wouldn’t encounter in the normal kind of work that they’re doing.”

[22:36] Julia asks Martin if he can say more about what builds and strengthens trust. 

Martin pauses as he thinks, then says “It feels like such a basic quality of life. You know, it’s very hard to define love, in a way. I don’t know, like, it feels like the more you come close to these fundamental parts or energies of life, the harder it gets to define them. But I would say that trust has a lot to do with the capacity to show myself without defense to someone else, like the capacity to let myself to let myself be seen in a deeper way.” He adds:

  • Like I said before, truth in communication is really essential for building trust, but I would also say that truth as such can also just be a weapon for war.
  • Equally, what is important is an attitude of empathy or of true curiosity about the other. I think this is especially [relevant] in the context of conflict, or of even worse situations in the world. It is not enough to say, I’m a peace worker and I’m on the good side. And over there are the fascists and warlords and the other perpetrators. If you really want to make peace, the question is, Are we also ready to really listen to the other side and to understand what prompts them to do that?
  • Do I want to tell something to the other, or am I actually open for a conversation that might also transform me? That might shift my viewpoint, because I think truth, in the end, is not just this thing that one person has and puts to the other, but it is an evolving, dynamic life process that lifts through the openness of communication.
  • I would also say, in a community context, reliability is a huge thing. That I actually know the other person will show up, and to know that there’s a sincerity, like if I know that another person really cares for life. There is this beautiful saying, I don’t care how your night was and what you have suffered, but I care, will you get up in the morning and do what is necessary to take care of whatever it is, the community or the children or whatever.
  • We’re going through this worldwide crisis. Another part of that reliability is also, are people participating in what is happening, or are they just shutting themselves down?

[27:40] Gordon reflects on Martin bringing up fascism and asks Martin “What’s your pathway or suggestion for how to respond to those kinds of political regimes that seem to be controlling and not helpful?” 

Martin responds by talking about Wilhelm Reich, a writer and thinker who really influenced him. Wilhelm “put forward the idea that fascism is not so much political ideology, it is much more the expression of an authoritarian character structure. So it is, you could say, in a way, it is the almost inevitable resolution of an inner conflict that happens inside people where there is so much of an inner separation between the kind of conscious, polite, bourgeois part and the suppressed, underground or emotional substrate of all those bottles of life energies.”

[30:44] Martin adds, “I think we have to find a way of addressing people that are, in a way, becoming followers of fascist movements. In a way, we’re really taking it from the angle of empathy of asking, Why are people behaving the way they’re behaving? And can we address the underlying hurt that is prompting them to demand all immigrants to be banned, for minority groups to be suppressed or even killed? This is not normal. This is not just human nature. It is the expression of an underlying pain. I think that we are getting to a real decision point in the world because the social systems and the political and economic systems that we are having now are more and more disintegrating. And then the question is, Will people stick fearfully in their identity groups and then have these kinds of conflicts to one another? Or are we able to embrace this disintegration as an opportunity for transformation and for an ecological regeneration? This second possibility, in a way, relies on an understanding of what is happening in ourselves and what is happening as we are driven by fear that really allows us then to make another choice.”

[37:02] Julia reflects on Martin talking about the economic and societal structure disintegrating, and can we embrace this as an opportunity to reconstruct community. She asks if he can make this a bit more practical, such as for individuals not living in his community. Martin replies:

  • I think some of it we can see in crisis situations or natural disasters, where people are suddenly no longer encountering each other in this anonymous way, but where they’re suddenly appreciating each other’s humanity and each other’s presence.

  • There is this beautiful work that is happening in Detroit, for example. After the economic crash where people just got together and did all kinds of social projects and community gardens and all of this. This is something that I imagine with the kind of growing disintegration of these large scale, centralized systems, that people will suddenly discover the power and existential value of community.

  • The capitalist dream has kind of bought us into believing that we actually just exist as these separate individual selves that are here to pursue this path of private fulfillment in profession and wealth. But actually, no, we are always in relation to other people. And what do we do if we acknowledge that? How do I engage? It really requires a shift of the ideal of living where we have to, I think, especially as Westerners, we have to take down this idea in our minds which separates us from a communitarian way of being.

[40:25] Julia shares her interpretation of what Martin said about being communal. She discusses how for those in individualistic or low context cultures, there’s a mindshift from thinking “I am alone” or “I am in a diad” to being embedded in a matrix of community. She clarifies with Martin that is inviting us to look around to see that we are indeed in community. Martin responds:

  • I feel like if people go into this shift of perception, there are just natural reactions, like, how do I make this place that I live in more beautiful? How do I engage with people in a way that increases empathy? How can I be a contribution for the well-being of the community? Those would be questions that will guide me to answers.

  • There is a certain awakening of we are communitarian beings. And I think this shift is the inner revolution that is needed for us to survive the climate crisis. Because if not, we’re going for eco-fascism. The powers that be will use the crisis to further perpetuate divisions in order to stay in the places where they are. But if people can actually learn the ways of community, they can use the crisis as a positive transition to a non-violent and more regenerative way of living.

[44:17] Julia talks about how she and Gordon think that Martin has a unique experience and viewpoints regarding the relationship between sexuality and conflict in the world, and asks Martin to speak to this.

Martin says:

  • “I was speaking before about a little bit of history of the project and this idea of the relationship between the success of political change on the outer and the transformation of the inner and where this kind of put people into this research of how do we live together in a way that we can really resolve conflicts between one another in a way that community of reliable trust arises. And in a way, the project didn’t initially make sexuality the key issue, but it just became so apparent that when you dig deeper and deeper and look at where many of these conflicts are rooted, you come to the area of sexuality, love, partnership.”

  • “Also, I would say the relationship between sexuality and the sacred, whatever you want to define that as, religion or God, like the words in a way don’t matter. But there is an inner, like there is a gravity center in the human soul that has a lot to do with was the sacred and with the erotic. They are not identical, but they are definitely strongly related, and when they meet, it is like, I think it’s the most potent soul power in humanity, and as sexuality is an area which in a way contains such deep holds, such deep desire, such deep longings, such a potential also for healing and transformation.”

  • “But also, as we’re coming out of a cultural era, this whole patriarchal era, where in a way, sexuality was damned and demonized, and especially female sexuality being so terribly punished and prohibited. It also holds such deep trauma and pain. And so when the promise for dissolution and surrender and deep desire meets with this deep expectation of pain, you have an explosive cocktail upon which a society can actually not exist in a peaceful manner, because patriarchal society in a way try to limit sexuality to the relationship of marriage, like in a way it was generally banned from social life from… the freedom of sexuality was just not allowed, but it was put into a into a into a little container in which it could be practiced. And actually, when you go into this container, you realize No, you are dealing with a universal power that is so immense that hardly any couple is able to deal with it on a one-to-one basis, because it is simply, like you’re putting a tornado into a small box. The forum and content do not correspond to one another. And so sexuality is dealt with in a very private way, but actually, when you look into what the people are going through in this area, you find basic patterns that are of collective character. And so, in a way, the question is, Do we want to stay on this level of denying, in a way, the societal relevance of that? Or do we want to acknowledge it, this issue, and include it consciously in a process of societal healing? I think this is, in a way, also the question that comes out of that, for anyone or for any movement that wants to really transform society in a humane way.”

[49:10] Martin goes on to say that many intentional communities also fail because of this, because they’re unable to actually deal with the energy; it requires a lot of wisdom and commitment.

[49:40] Julia refers to what Martin said about society putting sexuality into a little container and says that she thinks that’s where most of us are sitting. She asks Martin to elaborate what it actually means to have sexuality have society relevance and to incorporate it into societal healing.

[50:19] Martin points out that he’s not just talking about it in terms of lifestyle – he also wants to look at it in terms of cultural development. 

  • He mentions the book Sex at Dawn, “which has this anthropological view on sexuality and exploring in a way, prehistory and saying that most of the time that we as humans have been around, we existed in these communal clans where sexuality was just naturally shared as part of the communal existence. So this whole notion of private romance and this kind of marriage to just a small container in a way didn’t even exist. So in a way, yeah, I’m referring to something that in a way, seems like to be out of another world, but in a way, I also believe that as humans, we have a certain memory of a different way of life.”

  • “And I really want to stress this point that it is not for us about, does somebody live monogamously, or do they live polyamorously. The point is, really, Do we create communities, like social like forums of coexistence, where the issues of relationship between people are being dealt with consciously? Or do we leave it up to individuals to figure it out by themselves?”  

[52:07] Martin: 

  • “What we’re doing has a lot to do with – many of the processes that I described before around transparency and truth and self-revelation and trust, to also apply that to this area. To really ask the question like, What does truth mean? How much trust can be there? And what does it also mean to support each other in this area as we become more truthful human beings?

  • Martin goes on to speak about the healing power of honesty and transparency regarding sexuality and sensuality.

[55:12] Julia explores how to connect Martin’s beliefs and practices to the corporate world, e.g. at a team meeting. 

Martin says “Yeah, it’s a fascinating question. I don’t have a real answer for it, I must admit. But I will say that as people from all kinds of different societal positions visit Tamera, including leaders in all kinds of peacemaking organizations or even the corporate world, we started to create a program called the Global Love School, where those people come together to actually go into this kind of space of truth around sexuality and different kinds of experiences, but also open this conversation. What does it mean for us to follow these ethics of truth and trust and transparency in the sexual area, even if we are not in Tamera and are living our lives in the world. Yeah, it’s an incredible exploration, and it’s definitely not easy to take this inquiry of truth in this area out into the world.”


[56:48] Julia mentions the Global Love School and a documentary that’s coming out soon about it, called Love School, which is directed by Ian McKenzie. Martin adds that Spring 2020 is the current release date.


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Julia and Gordon met as members of the mediator community in Victoria, British Columbia. They share a passion for the transformative potential of conflict and how conflict dynamics play out in organizational life.

The On Conflict Podcast was born out the frustrating lack of application of mediator knowledge to some of the world’s troublesome conflicts. It’s our way of taking our work, which has been local to western Canada, to informing listeners around the world and creating a more far-reaching influence through our guests and ourselves.